Here’s a brief look into “Nirvana” by Alexis Cñe, releasing 6/1/18.
“Someone’s a big girl now!” he said playfully, making me smile and blush a little bit. “You ready to hit the streets with ya boy?”
“Do you have to ask?” I said giddily, walking to the front doors like I already knew where we were going.
“You tired of eating the same basic BS they’re dishing out around here yet?” I could see it in his face he already had a plan and was looking for confirmation.
“Am I?!” I paused. “But Roland, we’re just hanging, right? Like friends?” I nervously asked because I had been up and down about the way I was feeling about him lately. Getting away and alone with him would probably make those feelings harder to decipher.
“Nirvana. Why do you keep doing that? Every time you feel a little something good, you want to stop it. It’s okay to just ride those good feelings out.” He sounded a little disappointed as he grilled me with his gaze and I felt guilty that I was ruining the mood.
“I think you know the answer to that,” I said uneasily.
“I know that I know the answer to that, so I need to address it before we leave this place. I want to hear you say it. You’ve been hesitant and indifferent about your own thoughts since we met. I can see it on your face every time you get in that head of yours. Go ahead and say why?”
He was ready to clear the air and I knew it was time. I looked away not knowing how I wanted to put it. “Naw, look at me.” He came close and gently guided my face with the side of his index finger beneath my chin and locked eyes with me. The butterflies started waking up in my belly making me smile, which made him smile, causing those butterflies to have a field day.
“I…I’m not even going to lie. You’re kind of pulling me in, if you know what I’m sayin, and I don’t get pulled in, ever! I have never, ever, been pulled in!” I giggled as I saw him lighting up. “On top of that, I’m trying to learn how to cope with losing everybody I loved. I don’t know if I could handle losing…”
I hesitated because I realized that it was too late and he already knew that, too. I already looked forward to seeing Roland every day. I would miss the newfound happiness I get from him if he left today. I wasn’t in love with him or at least I felt like I couldn’t be, not yet. Whether I’d admit it or not, I was falling for this charming, intelligent, young man, the more time we spent together.
What will be Nirvana’s next move? Find out 6/1/18! To be notified of when this book goes live, be sure to join our mailing list – bit.ly/emailBLP